Divine Intervention
by Lucy Kay
Summary: Filling a long overdue request for HersheyChocolates101... oddity ensues. Owen is about to obtain random boy band knowledge, the Harvest God is going to be a little insecure about his hair, Luke will sing Kumbaya at some point, and this author will throw her head against the desk. I'm sorry? Rated T. Animal Parade. Lord help us all.


I do not own _Harvest Moon: Animal Parade_ nor hold association or third party rights with any of its affiliates. No copyright infringement intended.

Well, this is long over-due! And I apologize now for the outcome. This is one of the weirdest things I've written in a long time. Maybe ever.

A Harvest God and Luke involved one shot for HersheyChocolates101. Thanks as always for reading! I hope you like it?

As a side note, I use Harvest God and Harvest King interchangeably. I just got sick of writing the same thing over and over again because I didn't want to use his name for some reason.

EDIT:: Changed the word 'fried' to 'friend.' Pfft, whoops. Thanks, Cotton Candy Mareep. I'm a loser. xD

* * *

"Luke, watch it!" Owen shouted, stopping his hammer mid-swing. He staggered from the hesitation and reeled backwards to regain his balance. Catching his breath, he glared at his smaller friend. "What were you doing?!"

The blue-haired carpenter boy simply shrugged with open arms. "Mwidunno. Thought I saw something shiny."

Owen let out a heavy sigh and shook his square head. "You need to be more careful! I let you tag along because you insisted you were bored enough to be interested in mining, but if you're going to stick your nose in the way of my hammer again I might not hesitate to whack it. Stay back."

Luke started to wonder why he tagged along, too, feeling sore about getting scolded by his best friend. He stuck his hands behind his back and started to whistle as he paced about the level of the Upper Garmon Mine. The tune ricocheted off the walls and echoed throughout the room, making Owen's eye twitch.

"Could you cut that out?" He called, striking another rock. It cracked open and a white wonderful fell out.

"Aw, come on! What am I supposed to do if I can't even whistle?" Luke whined, plopping down against the wall.

Owen studied the wonderful with satisfaction, pocketing it and wiping the sweat from his brow. "I don't know, Luke… Use that hammer I lent you. See how high up you can go without killing yourself."

Luke's amber eyes shone with the challenge. "Sounds exciting! Alright – see you at the top!"

And with the disappearance of his heavy footsteps and one last 'whoop,' Owen was finally left alone to his work. With a smile, he labored away at a casual pace for a good half an hour. But Luke still hadn't come back. Guilt started to gnaw at the muscled young man for letting his inexperienced, albeit annoying friend go off on his own. Finally, Owen dropped what he was doing and climbed the stairs.

"Luke?" Owen called. Echoes of his own voice came ringing back to him. He climbed a few more floors. "Hey, Luke! Where are you?"

The silence was unnerving. Owen started to run up the flights of stairs, slowly noticing that there wasn't much to block his path like usual. That was odd. How far did Luke go?!

"Luke!" Owen shouted again. This time he was answered with the loud ringing of hammer against rock. Owen ascended a final staircase and peered through the darkness where Luke was smashing away at a boulder. "Luke?!"

"Oh, hey, Owen!" Luke smiled, turning to acknowledge him. He quickly struck the boulder again. "What's up?"

"What's up?" Owen asked. He looked back at the path that had been plowed through. "What's up?! Luke, you've cleared ten floors. And you've barely broken a sweat!"

Luke shrugged, swinging the hammer again. "So? Mining's pretty easy!"

Owen huffed at the statement, defensively crossing his arms. "Well, maybe it's because you're not looking for gems…"

"Whatever," Luke said, not understanding he was being offensive. "Hey, check this out! This boulder's about to give way. I think there's a light on the other side!"

"What?" Owen groaned disbelievingly. He shoved Luke aside and peered at the boulder. A small crack of white light was indeed there. When he passed his hand over it, he could feel a cold breeze. "Holy shit. Yeah, look – there's a breeze!"

"What? Where?" Luke asked, pushing forward like he could see the wind.

"Here, hold your hand like this." Owen demonstrated.

Luke outstretched his palm over the light. The cold tickled through his fingerless gloves. He smiled wide. "Cool! Now move – I want to see what's on the other side!"

With some arguing, the two worked side by side to clear the boulder in a matter of minutes. As the rock crumbled away, a great wind passed them with rays of bright sunshine.

Before Owen's eyes could adjust, Luke was crawling through the opening. "Luke! Wait up a minute!"

Luke obviously ignored him and pressed on. When Owen squeezed through the opening, he was beholding the same sight as his crazy-assed, bandana clad friend.

Snow was piled around the stone outcropping, but the clouds below them told Owen it was too high up for snowflakes to fall. The grey mountain face was right before them, along with a decorated hot spring for some odd reason. And another door. Well, what do you know? As Owen was taking in the sight of his home town from a bird's eye view, he didn't notice Luke rapidly ascending a precarious staircase behind him.

"Wow… it makes you feel really small, you know? Our whole lives are down there. And even from where we are, you can't see anything but ocean. It must be how old Pascal feels. There's this endless expanse of horizon. It really humbles you. Makes you realize how insignificant you are. You know?" Owen turned around. Of course he didn't know. Luke was too busy dangerously running across an impossible staircase. "Luke! Careful up there!"

Luke threw his head back laughing. "Sure thing, _Mom!_ Jeez, are you coming up here or what? There's this big stage!"

Though it was difficult for Owen to believe Luke just made a mom joke as half an orphan, he carefully crawled his way up the stony steps. Mind, he wasn't scared, but… heights just… spooked him. Anyone would be scared of these stairs though – there wasn't any kind of railing, they were old as the mountain wall they just broke through, and the drop was a chasm deeper than the eye could see. Only an idiot like Luke (or that crazy farmer) could run blindly up these stairs.

By the time he finally reached the top, Owen was panting with the adrenaline and Luke was dancing like a lunatic on what did appear to be a giant, stone stage. "What is this place?"

"Who knows? Maybe some ancient people liked rock music after all," Luke demonstrated an ancient concert with his air guitar.

Owen wasn't convinced. "Come on, this place gives me the creeps. Let's go."

"Go? We just got here!" Luke complained. "Besides, this could be just the beginning. Maybe if we break through the wall over here, there will be a whole other world!"

And just when he thought Luke would make sense and suggest a hidden mine… no. He went ahead with the impossible. Owen crossed his arms. "I highly doubt that. Now come on – I'm hungry."

"You're always hungry," Luke rolled his eyes, tightening the bandana around his head. Blue hair poked out of every gap, making him look as wild as his ideas. He planted his foot firmly upon the dais. "I claim this stage thing as Luke the Great's!"

Before Owen could ask about this new title, a great rumbling from underneath them ensued. Like the very heart of the mountain was surfacing. The poor pair were shaken to bits as Luke hopped quickly off the stone stairs and moved to his friend.

"What's going on?!" Luke asked over the roar.

A great voice echoed through the rocks. "How dare you claim my dais?"

"What?" Luke hollered. "I don't have any dice!"

"Who is that?!" Owen shouted unnecessarily as the shaking came to a quick halt. Standing upon the dais was a glowing being cloaked in imperial robes. His hair was long and braided and the color of fire like his burning red eyes.

"I am the Harvest King," the god introduced, "the owner of this dais and lord of these lands."

"Look, man, I didn't take your dice," Luke fearlessly stepped forward, showing his open palms. "See? No dice here."

"Luke, are you crazy?!" Owen whispered harshly.

Luke glared at him. "What? I don't have his dice!"

"How dare you summon the Harvest King? Speak quickly!" The Harvest God demanded.

Owen stared stupidly in a mixture of shock, awe, and fear. Luke, however, was unphased by this divine being. In fact, he was already growing bored. Easily distracted as always, he commented loudly: "You stole my haircut."

"What?" The Harvest King asked, ruining his mighty image.

Luke nodded. "Yeah, I mean, it looks better on me and red's not really my color, but our hair is totally the same. You stole my haircut."

"Luke, shut up," Owen warned.

"No I did not," He folded his arms across his chest, actually arguing the point. "We look nothing alike."

"Yeah, we do!" Luke insisted. "See in the front? There's that wave thing happening. That's mine."

"Luke, drop it!"

"You can't lay claim to hair!" The Harvest King said.

"Yeah, I can. Just did. Before you, so you stole my haircut."

He turned to the bystander for reassurance. "My hair looks nothing like his."

Owen shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets. "No, not really…"

"Not really? Mortal, are you blind?!"

Quickly adding, Owen said: "I mean: it's not the same. Not at all. Just… similar in that wild, untamed factor – what the hell are we even talking about?!"

"The fact that he stole my hair," Luke repeated stubbornly.

"Luke!" Owen begged.

Luke shrugged, pulling his gloves tighter with disinterest. "Fine, it's not a big deal, I guess. I'll just take it as a compliment."

The Harvest King's frown deepened. Like that was possible.

"Uh… we'll just be going," Owen said, making his way for the staircase. "Nice meeting you, er – your… Harvest… ness… We'll just… keep doing what we do… pretending that we're…. cool… so c'mon… Luke! Let's get out of here!"

"What was that?" Luke asked, eye brow rising. "What does that even mean? Were you quoting something?"

"Of course not!" Owen answered too quickly. "Stairs! Now!"

"Chloe's music finally getting to you, eh?" Luke smiled. He showed off his boy band knowledge with a dramatic head banging session. "TONIGHT I WANT SOME—"

"No, that's not right," Owen cut him off. He head banged, too, correcting his lyrics. "TONIGHT LET'S GET SOME!"

"Oh, yeah!" Luke laughed and started rowing an invisible boat. "Like this, right?"

"Yeah!" Owen nodded, immediately remembering the dance. The two rowed invisible oars in synchronization. "TONIGHT LET'S GET SOME—"

"SILENCE!" The Harvest King boomed, knocking the two out of their strange, pop culture reverie.

"And live while we're young…!" Luke quietly sang, finishing the song. The silence was a little overwhelming, so he cleared his throat. "Heh. That's a weird song. I don't listen to weird songs. Chloe's music is weird. Pfft. Weird."

The Harvest God waited for the silence to return. Mortals always infuriated him, but these two were a piece of work. What to do with them? Cast them from the mountain? Turn them into apples and eat them? Curse their descendents to constantly regenerate so that their lives become a meaningless cycle of endless save slots? Really, the possibilities were endless.

The Harvest King held out a hand and dramatically decreed: "I punish you, foolish mortals, with the curse of—"

Not quite so surprisingly, he was interrupted yet again by the notorious Luke. He had raised his hand, but finding no one to call upon him, shouted out his question. "Hey, Harvest King? I didn't want to remind you because of the hair thing, but you're standing on my stage."

Fury ignited in his eyes as he glared down at the idiot boy. "Your what?"

"I claimed it like… four seconds before you showed up. Property of Luke the Great," Luke stated the facts. "Sorry, like the hair claim, I beat you to it."

His patience cracking, the Harvest God slowly descended the stairs towards Luke. His voice strained with every word he uttered. "I… have been standing upon this dais… for the last eight thousand years… How could you possibly have claimed it first?"

Luke shrugged, completely not intimidated. "Finders keepers, man. If you didn't want your stage thing taken, then maybe you should've put up a sign or something."

As the Harvest God twitched with anger, Luke sped past him, running up the steps and sitting cross-legged on the dais. The Harvest God spun around and shouted: "Get… get off of my dais! This instant!"

"Nope! Finders keepers, dude, and I'm the finder, so I'm keeper."

Owen stared open-mouthed at the exchange, shocked at his friend's absolute gall to challenge a supposed god.

"You descend those steps, mortal, before—" He threatened darkly.

"I'mma singing, my Lord! Kumbaya!" Luke sang loudly, not paying him any attention. "I'mma singing, my Lord! Kumbaya!"

"Those…" The Harvest God stuttered. "Those aren't even the words! Get down from there!"

"Oh, Lord! Kumbaya!"

The Harvest God turned to Owen. "Is he… always like this?"

Owen watched Luke singing off key and shrugged. "I guess so. Kumbaya is a new one though."

Forgetting the trouble, the Harvest God asked: "So what do I have to do to get him off my mountain?"

"You're not going to curse us?" Owen regrettably asked.

The Harvest God bit his tongue, crossing his arms again. "If you can remove him in ten seconds, I might change my mind."

Quickly, Owen turned and called: "Hey, Luke! The Harvest King says he opened a portal to another world at the entrance to the mine! Let's go!"

Stopping his song, Luke jumped up. "Whoa, really?! I'll beat you there!" And with that, Luke buzzed by them both and sprinted recklessly down the stairs and disappeared into the open tunnel.

Owen watched him go and turned back to the Harvest God who was still looking unhappy at being harassed. He nervously chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh… guess I'll go to the bottom and… pretend the portal closed or something…"

"Sounds like an idea," The Harvest God muttered, waiting for him to follow his friend.

When Owen finally disappeared through the tunnel he created, the Harvest God practically fell upon his dais in exhaustion. Punish them! That idiot around was punishment enough…

* * *

"Yoo-hoo!" A girly voice called. The Harvest God looked down the stairs and saw the farmer who brought him into this mess in the first place. She was holding an apple in her hands. "Hey, Harvest God! I'm back with a present!"

"Great…"

Molly the farmer skipped up the staircase without glancing down once. And here the Harvest God thought those stairs would prevent any sane person from crossing, but that turned out to be the problem. He got all the loonies.

"Hey, there!" Molly greeted him with a blush and a smile. She handed him the apple which he took with a frown. "I've got big news!"

"What's that?" The Harvest God asked, debating on eating the apple now or later.

"Well, you know how you were looking for someone with a pure heart?" Molly asked.

Of course he remembered. He was surprised though that she had a solution. "Yes, of course. Have you a pure hearted person?"

Molly nodded enthusiastically. "It took me forever to decide, but a friend of mine seems perfect for the job. He's clever, energetic, strong, and very brave. He might be a bit odd, but given some time with him, I'm sure you'll see his heart's as pure as gold."

The Harvest God looked up, surprised that Molly had bothered to bring him along with her today. Climbing up the stairs and jumping before him with energy was her blue-haired candidate. "Hey, your Harvestness, what's kicking?"

"Oh, _hell_ no—"

* * *

A/N: I'd just like to say that I do not think that Luke and the Harvest God have similar hair. Luke's just really dumb in this one shot.

Plus also, I feel like I could create a whole story from this… I don't know what the end would be or how long it might get, but it sounds like it could be built on, you know? Oh, well. This is a humble one-shot. An idea maybe, but that's all I'm doing. :)


End file.
